Mansplaining is a form of condescension that usually takes place between a man and a woman. A man will explain to a woman something that she already knows or that he’s not an expert on, typically condescending, assuming that the woman knows less than him on the topic.
It’s just as rude as regular old condescension. Still, it lacks the authority-granting power of being, you know, an actual expert.
What is mansplaining?
Mansplaining is a condescending, patronizing, and often insulting way for a man to look down upon and manipulate a woman. It’s telling her that she doesn’t know what she’s talking about or is wrong. And it’s a way of putting her in her place.
Mansplaining is an act of sexism, plain and simple. But it’s also frustrating, condescending, and just plain annoying. So, what can you do if you’re on the receiving end of mansplaining?
How do you spot a mansplainer?
We’ve all been there. We’re in a conversation with someone, and they start explaining things to us in a condescending way. Sometimes it can be hard to tell if the person is trying to help or if they’re mansplaining.
So, how can we tell the difference? And what should we do if we think someone is mansplaining to us?
A mansplainer will typically do one of three things:
Talk down to you.
Mansplainers usually have an air of superiority and look down upon anyone who doesn’t share their same views or opinions. They tend to be condescending and patronizing, often talking down to you to make you feel inferior. They may also make insulting or condescending remarks about your intelligence or abilities.
Over-explain something that you already know.
Mansplainers are those annoying people who always need to explain things to you, even when you already know what they’re talking about. The implication is that the man thinks the woman is too dumb to understand the concept independently. Mansplainers often use unnecessarily complicated language or speak in a tone that conveys patronizing disbelief.
Assume that they’re more knowledgeable than you are on a topic, even if they’re not an expert on the subject.
You’re trying to talk about something you’re passionate about, and the other person assumes they know more than you because they’re a man. Even if they’re not an expert on the topic, they act like they are and talk down to you in a way that’s both insulting and frustrating.
If someone is doing any of these three things, they may be trying to manipulate you. You should be mindful of this and stay away from anyone who might be trying to take advantage of you!
But, wait! Here are two more:
a. They talk over you or interrupt you. Mansplainers love to hear themselves talk, so they often talk over you or cut you off mid-sentence.
b. They get angry when challenged. If you dare to challenge a mansplainer or call them out on their behavior, they’ll often get mad and defensive.
When does mansplaining become manipulation?
Is he just trying to help, or is he mansplaining?
When does mansplaining turn into manipulation? It’s not always easy to tell. Sometimes men are genuinely just out of their depth, and sometimes they’re purposefully trying to manipulate you. The best way to tell is to learn about the red flags for manipulation.
It’s often done by using guilt trips or insultingly condescending language. For example, telling a woman that she’s being “emotional” in an argument is a form of mansplaining that is also manipulative.
Guilt trips are often used in mansplaining to guilt the listener into doing what the speaker wants. For example, a man might say, “you do not understand what I’m trying to explain,” to guilt the woman into giving him more attention.
Finally, emotions are often used as a weapon in mansplaining. For instance, a man might act angry or frustrated to make the woman feel guilty or like she’s not doing enough.
If you’re unsure whether someone is genuinely trying to help or manipulate you, pay attention to these red flags. If mansplaining is happening, it’s not coming from a place of pure altruism.
Signs of manipulative men
They’re the type of guys that always has to be correct, no matter what. They love to mansplain and are always quick to point out your flaws. They’re also manipulative AF, always trying to control the conversation and get their way.
And don’t even get me started on how insulting they can be! If you’re dating a manipulative man, he’s constantly putting you down and making you feel like you’re not good enough.
He might say things like “you’re too emotional” or “you’re overreacting” to invalidate your feelings. He might also gaslight you, a form of manipulation designed to make you question your reality.
If you’re in a relationship with a manipulative man, it’s essential to stand up for yourself and set boundaries. Don’t let him control you or your emotions. And most importantly, don’t be afraid to walk away from a manipulative man – he’s not worth your time or energy!
In the end
Mansplaining is not just a term. It describes a typical attitude that can be difficult to recognize. It’s time to step away when you start to see the red flags. You deserve better.
